Spicy Crab Cakes with Sriracha Aioli & Pineapple Kiwi Salsa (paleo, Whole30)

This not your momma’s polite little garden party crab cake. This crab cakes sits legs splayed in a skirt, puts its cigarette out in your sweet tea, and gives you a snarl.

A note here on making aioli. For the love of all things holy, follow the instructions. Your instructions using a whisk? Break that bad boy out. Found instructions for a Vitamix? Use that. I am aioli-retarded and can’t seem to make it – ever – to save my life. Why? Because I don’t listen. I started out this meal’s mayo sojurn with an immersion blender using a recipe written for a whisk-using over-achiever – and made a runny, kinda broken mess. I then Googled ways to fix the mess – and ended up wasting another 2 eggs in the process. I threw the whole batch out, grabbed my Vitamix, Googled Vitamix-specific instructions, and went to town. I waited until the noise of the aioli whipping around the blender changed – until it sounded like slaps instead of whirring madness – and I still thought I’d screwed something up – until I let the mayo sit and it firmed up on its own. So, take it from me: calm the crap down. Calm down and follow directions and your aioli will turn out just fine. No need to use half a bottle of grapeseed oil & over half a dozen eggs in the process.

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Spicy Crab Cakes with Sriracha Aioli & Pineapple Kiwi Salsa (paleo, Whole30)

8 ounces crab (lump or claw, canned is perfect here)
2 tsp. brown mustard (I use Gulden’s spicy)
1/4 c. paleo aioli
2 Tbsp. coconut flour
1.5 tsp. chipotle powder
1 scallion
1 tsp. sea salt
1/4 tsp. white pepper

Drain the crab and pick through for errant shells. Drop into a large bowl. Slice the scallions thinly and add to the bowl. Add the rest of the ingredients and stir to combine.

Form into patties and place on a parchment-lined plate. Chill 30 minutes to let firm up a bit.

While your patties are chilling, make the salsa.

1 kiwi
1/4 pineapple
1 shallot
2 Tbsp. cilantro
1/2 jalapeno, seeded

Scoop the kiwi out of its fuzzy jacket and chop finely. Chop the pineapple finely. Dice the shallot. Chop the cilantro. Dice the jalapeno. Combine all in a small bowl and store in the fridge until dinner is ready – you want this to sit about half an hour, so the flavors have a chance to mingle.

While everything else is chilling, take about a 1/4 of a cup aioli and add a teaspoon or two of Whole30 sriracha to make your sauce. Set aside in a small dish.

When it’s time to cook the patties, heat 1-2 Tbsp. coconut oil over medium heat. Add the patties and cook about 4 minutes per side, or until nicely browned.

Serve topped with the salsa and aioli.

Serves 2 for dinner.

Caramelized Peach, Chicken & Tomato Salad with Sriracha Lime Vinaigrette (paleo, Whole30)

Yum. Yuuuuummmmmmmm. Y-U-M. This salad is frickin delicious. On a random Tuesday, I was craving grilled peaches but was too lazy to bust out the grill for a quick lunch, so tossed some peaches along with some cheater roasted chicken from Trader Joe’s and this dish was born. Peaches + heat is a match made in heaven. Why have I been eating them straight all these years?! (oh yeah, because peach juice running down your chin is one of summer’s great touchstones)

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Caramelized Peach, Chicken & Tomato Salad with Sriracha Lime Vinaigrette (paleo, Whole30)

1 breast roasted chicken (or about a fourth of a package pre-roasted olive oil & black pepper sliced roasted chicken from Trader Joe’s)
1 peach
1 tsp. fat of choice (I’ve used both pork fat and coconut oil, and I must say the pork fat was a touch better here. big shocker)
1 c. (or about a third of a pint) grape or cherry tomatoes
A hand full dry toasted pecans
1 scallion
A few leaves fresh mint
A few leaves fresh basil
Juice of half a lime
1 Tbsp. grapeseed oil
2 tsp. Whole30 sriracha (aka: food of the gods)
Big fat finishing salt

Cut your peaches and chicken into bite-sized pieces while you’re waiting for a medium pan over medium high to reach temperature. Add a teaspoon fat of choice to the pan and follow with the peaches. Sautee, stirring a minute or two and add the chicken. Continue cooking, stirring every minute or two to prevent too much burning until the peaches are caramelized and everything smells heavenly.

While your peaches + chicken are doing their thing, slice the scallions and herbs thin and add to a large bowl with the pecans. Slice the tomatoes in half and add to the bowl.

In a separate small bowl, whisk together the sriracha, grapeseed oil and lime juice.

When the chicken & peaches are done, add to the large bowl. Toss with the dressing and finish with a sprinkle of big fat salt.

Serves 1 for lunch – there may be growling.

Sweet Potato & Zucchini Hash with Pork (paleo, Whole30)

I had a craving. Well, two cravings. I wanted my old best friend comfort food – eggs and hashed browns – and a new friend – Thai laarb (a spicy, deeply flavored crispy pork dish). This version of the standby hash is kicked-up in the nutrition department, features bunches of crumbly crispy pork, and uses up everyone’s favorite summer menace staple, zucchini.

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Sweet Potato & Zucchini Hash with Pork (paleo, Whole30)

1 pound ground pork
2 tsp. coconut oil
2 tsp. sea salt + more to taste
2 Tbsp. chili powder
1 Tbsp. ground cumin
1 Tbsp. granulated garlic
1 Tbsp. onion powder
2 tsp. ground chipotle
1 large sweet potato
1 medium zucchini
1 small onion
2 eggs per person
fat of choice for the eggs
Whole30 approved sriracha
Black pepper

Heat the coconut oil over medium high and add the pork. Break up with a spoon into the smallest pieces possible and add the spices and salt, stirring after each addition. Sautee until deeply browned and crispy and remove to a bowl (reserving the fat).

While the pork is cooking, grate the sweet potatoes, zucchini and onion. Add to the pan with the reserved pork fat when the pork is resting comfortably. Cook, stirring occasionally, until everything is soft and the sweet potato is beginning to brown in spots. Salt and pepper to taste.

In a separate pan, fry the eggs in a fat of your choice until your desired doneness is reached. Salt and pepper to taste.

Serve topped with sriracha (I used 2 tsp. per serving)

Serves 2 for dinner + 1 for lunch (with 5-6 eggs)

Summer On A Plate – Bacon, Tomato & Peach Salad (paleo, Whole30*)

I read something enchanting a few weeks ago: grilled bacon. I saw it somewhere, in some recipe header, and the concept lodged in my brain; unwilling to let go.

Grilled bacon, brain said, in the middle of the night. GrilledBacon, it said, in the afternoon. GRILLED BACON, it screamed, while trying to think of what to have for dinner. So I tried grilling bacon. And … ???? It was just like pan-fried bacon, only more burnt. Still fantabulous, mind you, since I happen to *like* bacon that’s been on fire – but not the best use of my bacony buck. Maybe I should have read the recipe afterall.

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Summer On A Plate – Bacon, Tomato & Peach Salad (paleo, Whole30*)

2 strips bacon (check your source for Whole30!)
1/2 pint cherry tomatoes
1 Saturn peach (or any variety, I just so happen to be addicted to the Saturn variety from Trader Joe’s)
3 leaves basil
Citrus salt
Balsamic vinegar (the best quality, thickest you can find)

Crisp your bacon however you see fit, drain on paper towels and chop. Chiffonade the basil, slice the cherry tomatoes in half, and the peaches in thin slices. Combine all and drizzle with balsamic. Finish off with some nice citrus salt.

Serves 1 as a side for dinner or lunch. Easily scaleable to feed more.

*This recipe can be made Whole30 compliant. Bacon isn’t completely verboten, just mostly. According to the Whole30 edict, bacon that is made with no added sugar is clear, which you’re most likely not going to find in the regular grocery store. US Wellness Meats sells Whole30 approved bacon, and your local natural food store, butcher or farmers would be a good place to look as well.

Roasted Cauliflower Steaks (paleo)

I saw the inspiration for this recipe somewhere along my merry food blogger wanderings, though I can’t for the life of me remember where. I read the title, moved on, meant to come back to it, and completely forgot. But somehow the title stuck with me – it was something about cauliflower steaks – and a hankering was born.

My version combines the nuttiness of roast cauliflower with the sweet depth of tahini and a sharp tang from Asiago. Capers would be fantastic here, as would any sort of nice nutty spice blend (za’atar would be dynamite). I served alongside a simple steak, though I could easily see this dish turned into a grilling affair.

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Roasted Cauliflower Steaks (paleo)

1 head cauliflower
Coconut oil
Sea salt and black pepper
1-2 tsp. tahini
A sprinkle of fresh asiago or parmesan cheese – omit if you are cutting dairy

Preheat your oven to 400F and line a baking sheet with foil.

Cut your cauliflower into 1/2 inch thick steaks – leaving the stem on for cutting helps. I had a medium head and ended up with 3 steaks + a bunch of florets.

Lay your steaks on the prepared baking sheet and brush with coconut oil. You might want to pour the oil into a separate dish to dip into or you just may end up with a little relative density of cauliflower vs coconut oil science project. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

Broil 25 minutes, or until the steaks are browned and smell nutty – make sure to flip halfway through to avoid burning.

When the steaks are browned, brush with tahini and sprinkle with parmesan. Broil until the cheese is melted.

Serves 2 as a side with enough florets leftover for a nice lunch.

Thai-Inspired Brussels Sprouts & Chicken Stir-Fry (paleo)

This dish was inspired by the best plate of brussels sprouts I’ve ever eaten. One of my DH and my favorite restaurants right now is Talde, an Asian/American mashup restaurant and bar helmed by the incredibly lovely and gracious in person Dale Talde (of quick-tempered Top Chef fame). Sadly, Talde is an only occasional treat as pretty much nothing I love best is ever paleo. Bacon & egg ramen with buttered toast broth, people. Pretzel pork & chive dumplings. Pad thai with fried oysters. Korean fried chicken. Seriously delicious stuff here. Talde had a brussels side one night that was fantastic. Stellar, even. Unforgettable.

This recipe is no way even remotely close to that flavor bomb, but it’s pretty darn good in its own right. Deeply flavored, intense in a good way; this makes a very satisfying weeknight meal for two. And, since it’s not a huge dish, it won’t break the gut bank, either.

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Thai-Inspired Brussels Sprouts & Chicken Stir-Fry (paleo)

3 cloves garlic
Tiny white onion – ping pong ball sized (or 3 Tbsp. finely diced)
1/2 inch ginger
Sesame oil
10 ounce shaved brussels sprouts (be forewarned: if you buy your brussels pre-shaved, they may be a bit bitter after cooking – that doesn’t bother me, but if it does you, shred your own – making sure to remove the core – with a food processor or box grater)
3 boneless, skinless chicken thighs
2 Tbsp. sesame seeds
1 Tbsp. fish sauce
1 Tbsp. Bragg’s liquid aminos (coconut aminos)
1 tsp. Chili garlic sauce (I use the brand with the chicken – like sriracha)
Lime juice would be stellar but I didn’t have any on hand

Mince the garlic, onion and ginger. Bring 2 tsp. sesame oil up to temperature in a wok or large skillet set over medium-high. Add the aromatics and stir until fragrant, about a minute or two.

Add the brussels and stir-fry until wilted and beginning to brown. While that is working, de-fat your chicken and cut into bite-sized chunks.

Add the chicken with an additional 2 tsp. sesame oil. Stir-fry. When the chicken goes opaque, add the sesame seeds and cook an additional 2-3 minutes.

Add the fish sauce, coconut aminos and chili garlic sauce. Some lime would be fantastic here as well. Let go an additional 2 or so minutes, or until the sauce has mostly evaporated and everything looks and smells intoxicating.

Serves 2 for dinner.

1-Ingredient Paleo Ice Cream

Oh, wow. I cannot believe I’ve ignored you guys like this. This recipe for banana ‘ice cream’ is really tasty, dead simple to make, whips up quick, and lasts in the freezer for as long as you need it to. It’s cheap, too, averaging however much bananas cost where you live per serving. And it’s paleo. Have I mentioned it’s also good? And filling? And healthy? And lactose free? What are you waiting for?! Ice cream waits for no man!

A good friend of mine recently made the jump to paleo (ok, it was a few months ago now) and I realized I hadn’t posted a recipe for this yet for you guys. This ‘ice cream’ is fantastic. I made it pretty much all summer last year and ended up almost living on it when the days got so hot I didn’t want to move, let alone put anything in my mouth that wasn’t freezing.

Also? It’s toddler-approved. My girl has a munchkin who loves bananas – and this dessert. It’s making its way into heavy rotation at her house as a summertime treat to combat her little guy’s first summer dealing with crazy heat.

This ice cream is surprisingly creamy for having a single ingredient and has a light banana taste when made with no add-ins. I always add almond butter because I absolutely love it and usually honey and a generous pinch of flaky salt as well. If paleo marshmallow fluff existed, that would go in as well. Ooooh. Steve’s Original Paleo Krunch (or some other grainless granola) would be fantastic here. Cocoa nibs if you’re so inclined.

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1-Ingredient Paleo Ice Cream

1 banana per serving

Add-ins: I usually use 1 Tbsp. almond butter + 1 tsp. honey + a big pinch of flaky salt per serving

Peel your banana, break into large pieces, and freeze at least an hour to overnight before starting.

Put your banana + any add-ins into your blender. Blend until it looks like soft-serve. At this point, your ice cream is entirely edible – but if you stick it in the freezer for a couple of hours, you will be rewarded with a rich, dense ice cream that is so satisfying you’ll never miss the dairy – or other ingredients.

Serves however many you want it to.

A note about blending: Don’t overload your blender. Just … don’t. Even if you have a Vitamix. Your blender doesn’t want to handle 9 bananas at once and you’ll have to dig out frozen and welded-together clumps of fruit before doing the right thing and blending 2 bananas at a time max. Just be patient and wait for the first bananas to do their thing before adding more. Of course this comes from experience. Experience and my wonderful, supportive DH giving a much-deserved ‘I told you so.’

Bonus shot!
Bonus shot!

Lemon Ginger Thai Meatballs (paleo)

I’m glad I kept those aging stalks of lemongrass in the crisper drawer. They’ve been there, silent, like an accusation, for weeks. I finally found a vehicle for their tender lemony brightness – meatballs. Specifically, Thai inspired meatballs. The lemon works well here, balancing the fish sauce and providing a nice bridge for ginger’s blustery heat. If you do not have access to lemongrass, a bit of zest would work; just don’t go crazy with it. A teaspoon or so should do.

My attempt to 'sex up' meatballs. My attempt to ‘sex up’ meatballs.

Lemon Ginger Thai Meatballs
1 Tbsp. chili garlic sauce
1.5 Tbsp. fresh ginger
2 Tbsp. cilantro
2 Tbsp. fish sauce
1 lb. grass fed ground beef
2 stalks lemongrass
2 Tbsp. coconut aminos
Fat of Choice (if you make this salad as a side, bacon fat is a fantastic fat to use)

Mince your ginger and cilantro. Add to a bowl with the beef, chili garlic sauce, fish sauce, and coconut aminos. Bash the lemongrass with the back of your knife to get the goodness out – chop and add to the bowl.

Form little ping pong sized balls and fry in fat of choice over medium heat until browned. Flip and brown.

Makes about 14 balls, enough to serve 2 for dinner + 1 for lunch.

Spicy Broccoli Slaw with Snap Peas & Bacon

This dish received the highest of praises from the DH. He not only ate every bite, he also said he really liked it. Sweet. Into the repertoire you go. While not strictly paleo as-written, you can easily swap something more paleo-friendly for the snap peas — tiny broccoli florets (broccoli overload!), kale, even celery would go great here. As would mango. Mmmmm … spicy mango.

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Spicy Broccoli Slaw with Snap Peas and Bacon

4 ounces thick-sliced bacon, diced
2 tsp. grainy mustard (I use Maille)
1 tsp. chili garlic sauce (I use the kind with the chicken and flecks of garlic)
2 tsp. apple cider vinegar (I use Bragg)
1 tsp. honey
3 Tbsp. almond oil (or any neutral oil – grapeseed would be great)
6 ounces broccoli slaw
5 ounces sugar snap peas
Flaky salt and pepper to taste

Brown your bacon, drain and set aside. Make a vinaigrette out of the wet ingredients and whisk to form an emulsion. Toss everything together and serve.

Serves 2 for dinner. Great with a grilled meat (or in our case, some really substandard bratwurst).

Pan-Seared Venison Backstrap with Blackberry Wine Sauce & Roasted Broccolini (paleo-ish)

This dinner was provided courtesy of Weber Farm. I am fortunate enough to have a best friend that is not only kickass, but has her own home farm (with eggs I dream about and honey I use way too quickly) and whose male relations hunt often and hunt successfully. It was at her table, way back in college, that I first tasted venison and loved it. Despite her years of warnings that venison is a meat on advanced setting, I finally conned her into sending me home with some to try and make something fabulous out of. And I did. She sent me home with two perfectly portioned baggies of pre-chunked venison back strap – which I’m guessing she uses in a braise – and the instruction to make her something good so she can crib the recipe. I think she would have enjoyed last night’s (and the night before’s) dinner as much as I did.

A note about venison: Venison (deer) is a very, very lean game meat that doesn’t taste particularly gamey at all if cleaned and prepared right (luckily, those Webers know what they are doing). It tastes kind of like really lean beef and can get very tough and chewy if you either cook it too long or not long enough. Venison is a meat that needs added fat – it’s too dry without it – so don’t be afraid to finish with a little butter. I’ve had it cube steaked & chicken-fried, stewed, steaked, jerkyed, burgered, and sauteed and have loved it each and every way. Venison is awesome and it’s a shame I can’t just run to the store and grab some. That, by the way, is a hint that I would like more, please, next time I visit 🙂

If you don’t have access to venison, duck would be fabulous here. Or, if that’s out of range, beef or bison would be great as well. Even chicken would be tasty. Or pork. Really pretty much anything that walks or swims and is slow enough to let you eat it. Pork belly would be amazeballs.

While I’m on the subject of substitutions, this sauce I made for duck would be a fantastic sub for the blackberry wine sauce in the recipe.

Yes, I see that these are green beans. I took this picture when we had a repeat dinner the next night.
Yes, I see that these are green beans. I took this picture when we had a repeat dinner the next night.

Pan-Seared Venison Backstrap with Blackberry Wine Sauce & Roasted Broccolini (paleo-ish)

The Sauce

6 oz. blackberries – fresh or frozen (I used a frozen package of fresh berries)
1 c. red wine (use your favorite, or if you don’t have a favorite, something that one liking red wine would happily drink. None of that cooking wine crap.)
1/2 in. ginger, peeled and halved
1 Tbsp. honey (I used wildberry honey from Whidbey Island, but any good quality honey would do)
1 Tbsp. unsalted grass-fed butter

The Venison

10 oz. venison (I used pre-chunked backstrap)
1 Tbsp. coconut oil
1 Tbsp. unsalted grass-fed butter
Granulated garlic
Granulated onion
Salt & pepper

The Veg

1 bunch broccolini (or like in the picture, green beans)
2 Tbsp. fresh grated parmesan (or other hard salty cheese)
2 tsp. olive oil
Salt & pepper

First, get your sauce going. In a medium pan over medium heat, bring the blackberries and wine up to a boil. Reduce the heat to a simmer, add the ginger, and macerate to break the berries up. Simmer 20-30 minutes, or until the wine has reduced and the sauce gets a little thick. If you want it thicker, simmer longer. In the last 5 minutes of cooking, add the honey and taste for sweetness – if it needs more, wait a minute or two before adding. When the sauce is at your desired thickness, turn the heat off and drop the butter in, swirling to combine – the heat from the pan will melt it.

While the sauce is going, turn your broiler on high and place the veg on a foil-lined cookie sheet. Drizzle with olive oil, sprinkle with salt and pepper and cheese. Broil 10-15 minutes or until the cheese is browned and the broccolini is just about to start burning in spots.

The last thing you want to make is your meat, as this is pretty quick-cooking. In a large pan over medium-high heat, melt your coconut oil. Add the venison, and sprinkle with salt, pepper, garlic and onion. Cook until browned on that side. Flip with tongs quickly, sprinkle the other side with seasoning, and let go until browned on the other side. Ideally, you want your pieces to be medium-rare, so use your judgement. Venison cooks just like beef, and in my experience I was able to cook the large chunks perfectly, but had some chewy smaller bits. They were still delicious. When your meat has cooked to your liking, turn the heat off and drop the butter in. Toss to coat as the butter melts.

Serves 2.