Dilled Kale Salad

This summer salad utilizes fresh baby greens and an unusual ingredient in salad – fresh dill. Makes a great dish to bring to a potluck on short notice.

gluten-free, paleo, whole30, vegan, vegetarian, keto


Dilled Kale Salad

Roughly 1/2 a pound baby kale

1/3 c. avocado oil mayo (I use Sir Kensington’s)

1 Tbsp. whole grain mustard (Maille is my favorite)

2 Tbsp. chopped fresh dill

2 big cloves garlic, grated

2 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar

Juice of 1 lemon

Sea salt & black pepper

1/3 c. toasted pine nuts

1/4 c. shaved parmesan (optional)

In a large bowl, combine: mayo, lemon juice, dill, grated garlic, and apple cider vinegar. Hit with salt and pepper – taste. You’re looking for a robust dressing – something bright and acidic (maybe a hair too acidic, it’ll tone down when you add the kale).

Add the kale and toss to coat, taking care to massage the dressing into the leaves so it really soaks in.

Add the pine nuts and cheese if you’re using.

Serves 4 as a nice side; makes a good potluck dish

Low Carb Crack Chicken

Yeah, yeah, yeah, lots of dishes are called “crack chicken”. Why? Do the other authors, like me, just love hyperbole? Or is it that chicken is usually so ho-hum that any effort to turn it into a highly addictive substance that will invade your dreams and have you fighting the urge to sleep-binge-eat is just so compelling — and so utterly undeniably delicious — that it engenders not only love, but addiction?

I’m going with the latter explanation.

This chicken is just such a chicken. I spent the evening separated from its tantalizing smell due to poor time management, and spent the entire time I was out thinking about it. And couldn’t resist picking at the pan leftovers when I got home.

I’m eating it for two meals today, and I’m super bummed I only made three servings + tossed the rest of those pan drippings.

gluten-free, keto


Low Carb Crack Chicken

3/4 lb. – 1 lb. chicken (I used precut tenders)

1/4 c. mayo (I used Sir Kensington’s avocado oil mayo)

1/4 c. parmesan (I used my favorite flaked parme and shredded by hand – you want small bits so it will mix in with the mayo well)

2 Tbsp. garlic powder

2 Tbsp. onion powder

1 tsp. apple cider vinegar (or lemon juice)

Salt & pepper

Preheat your oven to 375F.

Pat your chicken dry and sprinkle with salt and pepper on both side.

Arrange on a baking sheet in a single layer, making sure the chicken doesn’t touch too much.

In a small bowl, combine all ingredients but the chicken, salt & pepper.

Spread over the chicken, making sure each piece gets a nice liberal coat.

Bake at 375F for 25 – 35 minutes or until the chicken is cooked through and the top is browning.

Serves 3 – 4 if you have self control. Fights may happen. Late night snacking is also a worry.

Probiotic Salmon Salad

Q: What does one do with kefir when you’re tired of drinking it? 

A: Kefir makes a great salad dressing for delicate early season greens and salmon.

Gluten-free, paleo if you use non-dairy kefir


Probiotic Salmon Salad

3 Tbsp. kefir
Juice of half a lemon
Big pinch sea salt
Few cracks black pepper
1 tsp. honey
2 Tbsp. avocado oil mayo
1 clove garlic, grated
3 Tbsp. chives, chopped
4 c. salad greens
2 Salmon filets
2 Tbsp. fat of choice
4 Tbsp. hemp seeds, divided in half

Thaw your fish if frozen and pat dry. Salt and pepper each side.

Set a large pan over medium-high heat. Add your fat of choice. When the fat comes up to temperature, add the salmon skin-side down. Cook 3 – 4 minutes without touching. Gently flip and cook an additional 3 – 4 minutes or until your desired doneness has been reached. 

While the salmon is working, add the greens to a large bowl.

Whisk together the kefir, lemon juice, honey, mayo, garlic, chives, salt and pepper in a small bowl. Set aside. 

Combine the greens with the dressing. Split between two bowls.

When the salmon is finished, place on top of the salad. Sprinkle half the hemp seeds per dish and enjoy.

Serves 2 as a light dinner. 

Meat CSA – Butcherbox – First Month

I’ve been missing the challenge of cooking with (almost) only what’s provided in a CSA box each month/week, and have decided to join a meat CSA + a salad CSA this year.

The meat CSA is monthly with no commitment, and the salad CSA will run from June – October.

ButcherBox is the meat source I’ve chosen for at least these first few months of Spring/Summer – I have another in mind that’s more of a 3-month commitment, but juuuust missed the quarterly cutoff date for signup.

ButcherBox offers a selection of meat from 100% grass fed/grass finished cows, pastured chickens, and antibiotic and hormone-free pigs that have led presumably happy lives. Each standard box features 8 – 11 pounds of meat and costs $129 with free shipping. According to ButcherBox, this equals out to 18 – 25 meals of 6 – 8 ounce portions for just under $6.00 per meal. They also offer larger box, but since I have a family of 2, I think the smaller will do.

They also have a promotion going on for a free pack of sugar-free bacon with your first box. And, they’re also heavily promoting with promo codes right now. If you sign up using this link: http://fbuy.me/fsNdv, you get $10 off your first box and I get referral bucks for sharing the love.

On to the box!


The shipment came in a sturdy cardboard box with heavy wrapping and dry ice. All items were loaded into the nice freezer bag you see, and my apartment building actually didn’t notify me on time of the delivery – so mine sat in the mail room for 24 hours before I could get to it … and the meat was still frozen. Color me impressed.

 

The Haul

(2) packages ground beef (2 lbs. total – estimated 8 servings)

(3) packages chicken breast tenders (2.5 lbs. total – estimated 10 servings)

(2) sirloin steaks (1.5 lbs. total – estimated 6 servings)

(2) packages ranch steaks (1.06 lbs. total – estimated 4 servings)

(2) packages country style pork (2 lbs. total – estimated 8 servings)

1 bonus package sugar-free bacon (10 ounces or 11 slices – “free” meat)

I based my serving estimates on 4 ounces per person. If everything goes according to that (admittedly ambitious) plan, I should have 36 servings of meat. With a family of 2, that should make 18 meals – or 4.5 weeks of dinner if we eat 4 home cooked meals a week. Since I generally only spend about $100 on groceries per week, $129 for a months’ worth of at least dinner meat seems like great savings – especially when you calculate in the cost of great quality meat when purchased somewhere like Whole Foods. That ish is prohibitively expensive.

 

The Meals

The first thing I made was Nom Nom Paleo’s Kaluah Pork in the Instant Pot with all of the pork. I wanted a big hunk of meat I could grab at will over the next week (turned into 2) because I was going to be extra busy and wouldn’t be cooking regular dinners. I also used a few slices of the bacon here and baked the rest up so I’d have snacking bacon + some yummy bacon grease to cook with.

The “Country Style Pork” was really chunks of what appeared to be shoulder cut into hunks that looked to be either nice chop or something else sized. When faced with unspecified pork, I did what I always do – went low and slow (or in this case, faked low and slow with machinery).

The pork made 8 servings: 4 dinners (2 pork and pineapple fried rice, 2 pork & cabbage), and 4 lunches (pork & kale salad with pineapple, pork & cabbage with an egg, pork tacos).

I noticed with the pork the recipe I made tasted a little better than usual. This method of pork cookery is not my absolute favorite, but was the one I trusted more in a pressure cooker, since I’m not terribly comfortable with the ratios and times for that piece of machinery yet.

The sirloin steak made 2 servings: I only got 1 dinner out of the sirloin steak because I didn’t have the heart to break up a steak into smaller components – it just felt like sacrilege.

I had intentions of marinating the steak and doing something schmancy, but just ended up pan frying them with the bare minimum of seasoning to eat with some leftover cabbage and butter. So much for the chimichurri I was craving.

The steak was fantastic, and I’m so happy I didn’t attempt to split it up into smaller meals. I know I said 6 meals up above, but that’s just crazy talk and I suspect my math is terrible. I could have maaaaaybe split it into 4 portions for two 2-serving meals, but damn that would have been sad. So, 1 happy meal it was – even with an uninspired fridge cleaner side.

I grabbed 1 of the 3 blocks of chicken tenders and roasted them tossed in a bit of ranch seasoning with veggies.

The chicken was great – maybe it’s psychosomatic, but I really think the chicken was moister – even though the tenders were thin strips, and I baked them aggressively (400F for 30 minutes). They weren’t entirely rubbery on reheat, either. I got 2 dinners + 1 lunch out of the block.

The second block of chicken was turned into my favorite low carb “crack” chicken. It was hard not eating the whole pan in one serving, but I managed to behave myself to get the three anticipated servings. (2 dinner + 1 lunch)

The third block of chicken I did a Thai-inspired kefir marinade on and cooked off to have on hand for lunches (3 servings).

The chicken made 9 servings: Each serving was 3-4 tenders or roughly 4 ounces.

I made simple steaks out of one package of ranch steak – just broiled quickly with a little butternut squash on the side.

The ranch steak made 2 servings with 2 servings left over for next month.

 

Actual Servings Garnered From This Box

8 servings pork

2 servings sirloin steak

9 servings chicken

A few servings bacon – mostly just incidental snack bacon

4 servings ranch steak (2 servings eaten, 2 left over)

Both pounds of ground beef (8 servings) are left over

31 total servings meat out of roughly 23 lunches and 19 dinners I usually make a month (When we’re behaving, we eat about 71 servings of meat a month at home between the two of us – I make 4 dinners for 2 a week, and I eat between 4 and 5 lunches at home; the DH eats 2 – 3 lunches at home per week). Some months are more; some are less – depending upon our schedules. This month featured more meals out than is ideal – but, I didn’t buy any meat this month at the store outside my ButcherBox, and I have lots of leftover meat – so there’s that.

So .. is this saving me money?

Maybe?

I estimate that I spend roughly a third to half my weekly food budget on meat – so about $30 – $50, and that meat is generally a mix of “good” stuff and “regular” stuff – just depends on the store I go to – but realistically, we’re usually only buying grass fed ground beef. The rest is whatever Trader Joe’s or the store we’re at has on hand. Unless it’s a Whole Foods week, then I just buy less meat because $$$$$ shock.

With what we spent at ButcherBox for the quality of meat we got – I think we saved money? I’ll have to give it a few more months to see if we actually did, but this month has at least provided us with the assurance that we have great quality meat in the freezer on hand for whenever we need it. If nothing else, that’s worth something – especially since I didn’t have to schlep all the way to Whole Foods and be aggravated about the ratio of #1 and #2 to #4 and #5 meat available. I also avoided the trap I fall into of either just buying the cheapest “good” stuff available and dealing with the consequences to my menu planning or grabbing an overpriced hunk of something because the energy expended in rapidly changing plans 57 times in the span of minutes because WF doesn’t have what I want has exhausted me to no end.

 

 

 

 

Pineapple Fried Cauliflower Rice

This side makes a great counterpoint for a bowl of Kaluah Pork, a nice sesame chicken, or a burger patty.

Gluten-free, Paleo, vegetarian, vegan


Pineapple Fried Cauliflower Rice

2 cups pre-steamed riced Cauliflower (or cauliflower-broccoli mix – I bought a steamer bag in my grocer’s freezer section)
1 shallot
2 cloves garlic
1/2 inch ginger
Hand full cilantro
Juice of 1 lime
1/4 cup crushed pineapple in juice
2 Tbsp. coconut aminos
Fat of Choice
Salt & pepper

Dice your aromatics – shallot, ginger and garlic. Add to a large pan with 2 Tbsp. of your favorite fat. Sautée until just starting to color.

Add the riced cauliflowers, pineapple, coconut aminos and lime juice. Sautée until the liquid has evaporated and everything is starting to caramelize.

Taste and hit with salt and pepper to taste. Stir in the cilantro. Sautée until your desired brownness is achieved (or your patience runs out).

Serves 2 – top with a fried egg & pulled pork and call it dinner

Brussels & Kale Caesar

This is a recreation/improvement on a salad I bought from Dean & Deluca last week. This version is eeeeeerrrrything I wanted that version to be – and then some (so good, in fact, that I got distracted while tasting it and putting my rings back on the wrong hands). The D&D version was good – but not Hannibal Lecter good (lost? explanation coming). Fine to smash at 9pm while waiting for the Ferry, but not what one would unpack ceremoniously from a fine box while going someplace.

I remember the first time I saw Silence Of The Lambs – the movie was great and all, but what *really* struck my little food nerd of a preteen heart was the end scene where Hannibal Lecter unpacks a Dean & Deluca picnic spread with great relish while on a plane. That spread (minus the brains, of course) set some life goals in place immediately (namely to shop there, live in NYC so I can shop there at will, and get one of those picnic packs). I also mailed away for a subscription to their quarterly catalog and kept that subscription going until I went away to college. Never ordered anything, but I drooled and dreamed.

While I’ve achieved two of those goals, I’m sad to say I have not gotten a picnic pack – mostly because while I love Dean & Deluca in theory, in practice most of the freshly made food I’ve gotten from D&D isn’t as amazing as I want it to be – and I’m not spending a Quintilian dollars on plane snacks when I can make my own. Possibly also because preteen me’s love of fancy packaging and tiny food is a tall order to live up to, and those packs always feature a bunch of stuff I’m not excited about – like gummy bears and other candy. Note to self: make my own tin-based travel pack packed with stuff I *do* like.

Gluten-free, paleo


Brussels & Kale Caesar

2 cups roasted Brussels sprouts halves (I roasted mine in some bacon grease on 400 for 25/30 minutes until deeply nutty brown)
3 cups baby kale
1 large clove garlic, smashed in a mortar & pestle
1/4 cup good olive oil
1 big pinch sea salt
Black pepper
1/2 tsp. lime juice (lemon would be more classic, but all I had was a bottle of my favorite Key Lime juice)
3 dashes Worcestershire Sauce
1 tsp. rice vinegar
2 hard boiled eggs, chopped
1 raw egg
1/2 cup raw almonds, chopped
1 anchovy, minced

To make: Roast the Brussels. While roasting, assemble the dressing.

Put two of your eggs in a small pot and cover with a couple inches water. When the water is boiling, lower a third egg down in a ladle so it is covered by the water but you still have a hold of it. Boil 1 minute and remove, immediately running under cold water or dunking into an ice bath. Let your other eggs go until you whisk the dressing, cover the pot and kill the heat, let sit until you’re done with the rest of the salad.

Crush the garlic in a mortar and pestle; add to a large bowl. Mince the anchovy and add. Add the coddled egg, Worcestershire, citrus juice, salt, a bunch of pepper, olive oil, and vinegar. Whisk to combine.

Chop the almonds and set aside.

When the Brussels are finished browning and have cooled until mostly not hot, add to the bowl with the dressing. Add the kale and almonds; massage to combine thoroughly.

Peel the 2 hard boiled eggs and chop. Fold in gently.

Serves 2 – 3 as a nice lunch or dinner side

Yuzu Sesame Slaw

This quick and easy side makes a bright, spicy counterpoint to a sweeter meat main or the Thai meatballs I posted last week.

gluten-free, paleo, Whole30, vegetarian, vegan


Yuzu Sesame Slaw

2-3 cups tricolor slaw mix (broccoli slaw would also be great)
2 Tbsp. yuzu hot sauce
1 jalapeno or serrano
1/2 bunch scallions
2 Tbsp. sesame oil
1 Tbsp. sesame seeds
1 tsp. grated ginger

Slice the scallions and chop the peppers; add to a large bowl with the slaw mix.

In a small bowl, whisk together the yuzu hot sauce, sesame oil, sesame seeds and grated ginger.

Pour the dressing over the slaw and massage to combine.

Great served with my paleo Thai meatballs, bacon and avocado, or a nice salmon burger.

Serves 2 as a salad base

Paleo Thai Spaghetti & Meatballs

This paleo version of spaghetti and meatballs brings the classic flavors of Thailand to your plate in a relatively quick to throw together dinner that’s both hearty and tasty.

gluten-free, paleo


Paleo Thai Spaghetti & Meatballs

For the spaghetti

1 spaghetti squash

For the meatballs

1 lb. ground chicken
1/2 bunch chopped scallions
1/2 inch grated ginger
2 clove grated garlic
1/2 grated shallot
2 Tbsp. sesame seeds
1 tsp. baking soda dissolved in 1 Tbsp. warm water
1 Tbsp. fish sauce
1 Tbsp. coconut aminos

For the sauce

2 Tbsp. sunflower seed butter
2 Tbsp. sesame oil
1 Tbsp. lime juice
2 Tbsp. fish sauce
2 Tbsp. coconut aminos
1/2 inch grated ginger
1 clove grated garlic
1/2 grated shallot
1 Tbsp. sesame seeds

First, halve your spaghetti squash (lengthwise for shorter noodles; widthwise for longer), scoop out the seeds and stringy guts, poke a couple holes per side, add cut-side down to a dish with a little water standing in it and cover tightly with saran wrap. Microwave on high 30 minutes or until tender. Uncover (carefully!) and let cool. Shred with a fork when cooled to make the noodles.

While the spaghetti is going, make the meatballs.

Combine all meatball ingredients in a large bowl and knead to combine.

Heat a Tablespoon or two of your favorite fat (I used coconut oil) over medium-high heat in a large pan.

Take the meatball meat, form into one-inch meatballs (as well as you can – my mix was a little wet and sticky so my meatballs were more like formed splats than round balls but were still tasty), and saute until browned and cooked through.

Set aside on a paper towel and cook batches until you are out of meat mixture.

While your last batch is going, make your sauce by whisking all sauce ingredients together in a small bowl.

To serve, toss the spaghetti with the sauce and portion, topping with meatballs.

Serves 2 for dinner with enough meatballs left over for lunch

April 18, 2017

It’s 8 am and the dog has forced me to go to the park. Where a rooster is crowing, the breeze is kicking, and salt is in the air.


I’m hiding in my hoodie like “Bright light! Bright light!”

And this jerk is prancing around like he got restful sleep (he didn’t. No one on my floor did – the asshole dog down the hall decided to freak the F out all night long). 

Dogs, man. All it took was moving by a quiet park for my grumpums of an old man to feel like a pup again.

April 17, 2017

Chopped style dinner including:

Leftover pot roast & carrots

Caramelized onion, shallot & garlic

Zoodles

Ghee & butter

Olive oil

Parmesan


It was delicious